Master Chief vs. SockHobbit, Round 1

Ahhh….what better way to start the day than to have an argument with the one you love? I’m not sure how these things start, really. We’re sitting there in the Coffee People (great coffee, by the way – very strong) drive-thru line, engine idling a little bit roughly, still clearing the morning’s cobwebs from our heads, and then it starts: a little “innocent” comment here, and little “not-so-innocent” comment there, and then by the time we arrive at my work, I’m getting the silent treatment and nary a “have a nice day” wish in sight; just the aroma of exhaust as she speeds (relatively speaking, of course – we drive a Taurus, remember?) away.

And now I’m sitting here wondering a couple of things: 1. How the whole thing started, and 2. How to fix the problem so that the argument doesn’t have to happen again. This, by the way, is one of the main differences (as I see it) between men and women. Men want to fix problems – it’s pretty much ingrained in us. Women seem to want to discuss problem, to unravel the mystery and swim around in it, hoping to find not only peace with one’s self, friends, relatives, and pets, but maybe, just maybe, stumble upon the answer to their problems.

Or they are angry with us (men) because we should have known better in the first place.

This morning, we got into an argument about what seems to be the argument du jour of recent: video games. More specifically, that she hates it when I play them. This, of course, contrasts greatly with my deep desire to kill aliens and hijack cars. This argument has occurred quite a few times, with the same type of conclusion: I usually concede and play less, meaning that the one TV we own is free for reality TV and sitcom watching (both of which I despise).

Lately, I’ve been thinking of an answer to both of our problems: a new TV. This will allow both of us to get what we want: I get video games, she gets TV (or movies or whatever), and we’re both happy. So I’ve been pushing this solution (granted, the TV that I want is still a little spendy – but that shouldn’t matter…I’m solving things here) every time we get in this argument.

But then she throws a curve ball at me this morning. And this one really came out of left field. She’s a crafty one, the SockHobbit (temporarily demoted due to the argument). She (wrongly) insists that if we were to invest in a second television, I wouldn’t hang out with her anymore—that I would be in our “office” playing video games for hours and hours on end; transforming into some creepy, antisocial, acne’d kid who’s only interaction with people comes from colorized pixels.

This, by the way, is an assumption on her part that she plays as absolute truth.

I think this is a bullshit argument, effectively shifting the severity of the situation from “small argument” to “you-don’t-love-me-anymore” argument. This also means that my only recourse is to blog about it, because if I bring it up anymore, she’s gonna break out the overly-dramatic “I’m going to my mom’s house tonight; it’s just not worth it anymore.”

In all honesty, I don’t know what to do here. It seems that the only way I can make her happy is to stop doing something that makes me happy, which doesn’t seem like a compromise at all – blackmail or coercion, maybe. But compromise? Not by a long shot.

So, another glorious morning in Andy’s World.

At least we didn’t run out of cat litter.