Winter Cleaning

I had a half hour to spare before a meeting and started cleaning out and organizing my hard drive's folders.

I had the sincere joy of running across this little slice of literary genius.

The document's file name is "NorthPoleU.doc".

And this is what I found when I opened it:

After I finished my internship at North Pole U, I was earnestly promoted to Little Helper. No, not an elf; they’re fairly unpleasant, especially with anyone cresting over four feet. Little Helpers don’t actually make the gifts or deliver them—a common misrepresentation of our impact in the Holiday Season. You see, we load and unload the sleigh. 1,500 kilotons. It's not fun. Then there's the cramped chimneys.

and 757s.

and Flatulent reindeer.

You’d want a drink, too.

--Secret Santa


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When I read this, I had no clue what it was about until the very last line. Then it all came flooding back to me. It was a note I added to a Secret Santa gift: a nice bottle of Concannon Cabernet Sauvignon.

There you go.